Shady Hug

There are some things in life that after 32 years you think you've got down.

For instance, I have been giving and receiving hugs now my whole life.  After 32 years of practice, I would confidently say I'm a darn good hugger.  

Let's define a "hug."

hug

verb

1. 1.

   squeeze (someone) tightly in one's arms, typically to express affection.

   "he hugged her close to him"

   synonyms:

   embrace, cuddle, squeeze, clasp, clutch, cradle, cling to, hold close,hold tight, take/fold someone in one's arms, clasp someone to one's bosom More

noun

1. 1.

   an act of holding someone tightly in one's arms, typically to express affection.

   "there were hugs and tears as they were reunited"

   synonyms:

   embrace, cuddle, squeeze, bear hug, clasp, hold, clinch

I have been recently informed that sometimes I do not give good hugs and that I cannot receive them at just any moment.  You see, it all depends on what color the hug is in the Shaw household.

Pink hugs are for anytime.  They are big, squeezy, and come with force.  They often linger and come with kisses.

Orange hugs are sticky and sometimes get lost in the bed.  With enough diligent searching, they can be rescued and given/received with care.

Blue hugs are not the favorite.  They are only given by being placed by the giver into the receivers open hands.

Yellow hugs are for outside only.  I mean... I should have guessed that.

Purple hugs are rare.

Black hugs are grumpy and never never given out.  They are forbidden and are usually accompanied by snarls and eye rolling.

I am mighty curious to discover what else I have been misguided on since infancy.